Let Your Heart Break #3: Joy

Paul and LaurenRight in the middle of a blog series about death, I am heading into a wedding. It feels as if I should complete my series before I turn in another direction. But life doesn’t work like that.

Death and birth. Crumbling and resurrection. Joy and sorrow. They weave in and out of each other on a daily basis. Life requires flexibility of the soul.

This isn’t just any wedding. This is the wedding of a child who was born into our family almost thirty-two years ago. Howard and I were twenty-eight years old when we brought him home for the first time, wondering, “What are we supposed to do now?”

Not sure we ever answered that question, but as the mother of both Paul and Laura, his sister born three years later, I learned about life and love, creativity and joy. On days when I struggled to get through a particularly exhausting parenting day, older friends would remind me to savor every moment, because childhood flies by. Thurston family 1986

It did.

And Paul is about to say, “I do.”

His fiancée, Lauren Holmgren, is an amazing woman. She has an inner light, clarity and strength rooted deep within her, and the two of them bring out the best in each other.

Of course, marriage is not all joy and delight. It is part of life, with all of its ups and downs, joys and sorrows. The daily-ness of marriage—or partnership for those still excluded from marriage—gives us the perfect place to work out all of our assumptions, rough edges and quirks. Some days are easier than others.

I am in the transition from spinning with all the details that need to be done toward savoring each moment. It’s sometimes hard to keep the bigger picture in mind—Paul and Lauren are getting Married!—when my calendar is full, my mind is trying to come to grips with Robin Williams’ suicide and my heart is aching with Michael Browns violent death in Ferguson, Missouri.

But that is Life.

And life is too precious not to take time to celebrate. I invite you to tip your glass in honor of Paul and Lauren, and all heart-filled, joyful events that are happening right now.

This blog is third in the series Let Your Heart Break…here about breaking open in joy.

Photograph of Paul and Lauren taken by Lisa Bogan.

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